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Finnish weather explained +15°C / 59°F This is as warm as it gets in Finland, so we'll start here. People in Spain wears winter-coats and gloves. The Finns are out in the sun, getting a tan. +10°C / 50°F The French are trying in vain to start their central heating. The Finns plant flowers in their gardens. +5°C / 41°F Italian cars won't start. The Finns are cruising in cabriolets. 0°C / 32°F Distilled water freezes. The water in the Vanda river (in Finland) gets a little thicker. -5°C / 23°F People in California almost freeze to death. The Finns have their final barbecue before winter. -10°C / 14°F The Brits start the heat in their houses. The Finns start using long sleeves. -20°C / -4°F The Aussies flee from Mallorca. The Finns end their Midsummer celebrations. Autumn is here. -30°C / -22°F People in Greece die from the cold and disappear from the face of the earth. The Finns start drying their laundry indoors. -40°C / -40°F Paris start cracking in the cold. The Finns stand in line at the "grilli-kioski". -50°C / -58°F Polar bears start evacuating the North Pole. The Finnish army postpones their winter survival training awaiting real winter weather. -60°C / -76°F Korvatunturi (the home for Santa Claus) freezes. The Finns rent a movie and stay indoors. -70°C / -94°F The false Santa moves south. The Finns get frustrated since they can't store their Kossu (Koskenkorva vodka) outdoors. The Finnish army goes out on winter survival training. -183°C / -297.4°F Microbes in food don't survive. The Finnish cows complain that the farmers' hands are cold. -273°C / -459.4°F All atom-based movent halts. The Finns start saying "Perkele, it's cold outside today." -300°C / -508°F Hell freezes over. Finland wins the Eurovision Song Contest.